The journey of a 1000 miles begins with a single step

Anger

How to deal with toxic persons

Source: Wisdom Path: A Zen master reveals the giveaway signs of a toxic person and the most powerful way to deal with them

“The deeper your present moment peace gets, the easier it will be to react non-passionately when confronted with hostility. As this gets better, you can begin to realize more deeply just how much someone has to be suffering internally in order to have such harsh reactions. With enough insight, you can develop your empathy and compassion based off this knowledge and these also help you remain even more peaceful in the present moment.

Continue the conversation.  Eventually, with enough compassion and insight on your side, you can begin to extinguish the fires of hostility by extinguishing anger with patience and understanding.

It’s hard to continue treating someone harshly when they continue treating you well. In helping them relieve these feelings, you not only help them but you also help yourself, since you no longer have to deal with them as they were.”

source: thepowerofideas, via: hackspirit

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A Zen master reveals the giveaway signs of a toxic person and the most powerful way to deal with them

Source: Wisdom Path: A Zen master reveals the giveaway signs of a toxic person and the most powerful way to deal with them

http://www.wisdom-path.net

We’ve all come across toxic people before. You know, the type of person that can be manipulative, judgmental and inconsiderate of anyone’s feelings.

It can hard to deal with these people, especially if you’re forced to every single day. That’s why I thought the advice below from a Zen master on Reddit was quite remarkable. 

But first, let’s define what a toxic person is so you know who you’re dealing with and then we’ll get to the Zen Master’s advice.

9 Traits of a Toxic Person

1) They talk more than they listen

Toxic people tend to have narcissistic tendencies and find it difficult to focus on anything but themselves. This goes against Buddhism where compassion and kindness for others (and yourself) is paramount.

2) They are never wrong

Everything they say is right and everything you say is wrong. They are unwilling to learn and will react harshly if you go against them.

3) Drama follows them

There’s always something wrong. If you offer advice, they’ll simply say it won’t work.

 4) They force relationships

It’s more about having relationships for the sake of other people seeing that they have relationships, rather than actually enjoying the connection for what it is.

Continue:

Wisdom Path: A Zen master reveals the giveaway signs of a toxic person and the most powerful way to deal with them


Anger and jealousy

Anger and jealousy are related to our sense of self-centredness and our disregard for others. Self-centredness easily gives rise to fear, which fosters irritation, which, when it blazes into anger, can provoke violence. The time has come to accept that if we’re talking about peace in the world, we have to consider peace within ourselves.

Dalai Lama


Dalai Lama: There is no such thing as a Muslim terrorist

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“Buddhist terrorist. Muslim terrorist. That wording is wrong,” he said. “Any person who wants to indulge in violence is no longer a genuine Buddhist or genuine Muslim, because it is a Muslim teaching that once you are involved in bloodshed, actually you are no longer a genuine practitioner of Islam.”

“All major religious traditions carry the same message: a message of love, compassion, forgiveness, tolerance, contentment, self-discipline – all religious traditions”.

Source: Dalai Lama: There is no such thing as a Muslim terrorist | The Independent


Reconsider!

Source: Reconsider! | Great Middle Way

greatmiddleway.wordpress.com

by

Aug 11, 2017

13872803_819791568120320_3096403631283864264_nAll tremble at violence; all fear death. Putting ourselves in the place of another, we should not kill nor cause another to kill.

All tremble at violence; life is dear to all. Putting ourselves in the place of another, we should not kill nor cause another to kill.

If, while seeking happiness ourselves, we oppress with violence other beings who also desire happiness, we will not attain happiness hereafter.

If, while seeking happiness ourselves, we do not oppress with violence other beings who also desire happiness, we will find happiness hereafter.

Speak not harshly to anyone, for those thus spoken to might respond in kind. Indeed, angry speech hurts, and retaliation may overtake us.

—Buddha Shakyamuni, Udanavarga


Being a master is much better than being a slave

In ordinary life, we are under the power of disturbing emotions such as self-importance, anger, and desire. We have no control over these emotions, so they torment us and we suffer. We are their slaves, which is unpleasant. The purpose of the Dharma is to reverse that situation and to help us master the disturbing emotions – self-cherishing, pride, desire, anger and hatred – that enslave us. Being a master is much better than being a slave. Do not lose sight of this essential point: The aim of the Dharma is to get rid of disturbing emotions, and this is the only way to attain true happiness.

~ Shechen Rabjam Rinpoche


To Punish The Guilty

Source: To Punish The Guilty | Great Middle Way

greatmiddleway.wordpress.com

June 11, 2017

15078564_1125462877500741_5942620198067922327_nI want —I need— to assign blame. I reduce actions to labels. I opt for simple answers. I take sides. I demonize the other. I want to punish the guilty, I want justice.  I am right; they are wrong. Why can´t everyone else see what is clearly self-evident?

It is more complicated than that, and yet also more simple. By assigning blame here or there, I externalize responsibility. I avoid looking at what I and all sentient beings share: the wrong views of separation and supremacy, my innate self-grasping and self-cherishing, my delusion.

Yes, my perception of reality is self-evident to me; it is evident to this self. It is my perception.

“Perception is burning. Ideas are burning. Consciousness is burning. Contact is burning. And whatever there is that arises in dependence on perception —experienced as pleasure, pain or neither-pleasure-nor-pain— that too is burning. Burning with what? Burning with the fire of attachment, the fire of aversion, the fire of indifference.” —Buddha Shakyamuni, Adittapariyaya Sutta, SN 35.28

The fires of attachment, aversion, and indifference are the three killers. To fan these flames further can only increase our suffering. To extinguish these fires is the only solution.

“He abused me, he beat me, he defeated me, he robbed me,”

—in those who harbor such thoughts, hatred will never cease.

“He abused me, he beat me, he defeated me, he robbed me,”

—in those who do not harbor such thoughts, hatred will cease.

For hatred does not cease by hatred at any time:

hatred ceases by love, this is the law everlasting.

—Buddha Shakyamuni, Dhammapada